The Real Mrs. Tobias: A Novel by Sally Koslow
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Web ID: 15058308Ratings & Reviews
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4.5. mother-in-law, expectations, not on brand…
4.5 Mother-in-law, expectations, not on brand… “Good people make bad choices in haste.” “ The incident” is the crisis of the moment for the Tobias family. What did Micah do and what choice did he make? How will his decision affect the entire family? The extended family tale of three women— Veronika, her daughter-in-law Mel, and Mel’s daughter-in-law Birdie. They are dealing with personal issues and family angst. “The incident” and David’s (Veronika’s husband) health condition are currently traumatizing all in the family. How will each react? A tale of family relationships and how women are the glue who hold the family together. * I loved it from the beginning! Easily among my top favorites for 2022. Glad I bought it! * Engaging characters with identifiable behaviors. * Author paints a vivid picture! * Delicate, humorous handling of family issues. I laughed out loud throughout this book! * I would buy/read other books by this author. Suggestions? * Very creative! I’ve not read any books similar to this!
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
Great read
A slice of life about two very different families tied together by marriage, concentrating on the realtionships between the mothers- and daughters-in-law. I fell right into this book. On the one hand, I couldn’t wait to finish it, to see how the multitude of issues that arise would be resolved. But on the other, it was such a good read I didn’t want it to end. It’s funny, but it’s guaranteed to push all your emotional buttons as well. In her notes, the author says she really had time to get to know her characters on account of the COVID pandemic. It shows—there’s no doubt they’re from where they’re from, but each one is so fully developed I felt as though I knew them personally. Maybe that’s what makes The Real Mrs. Tobias so affecting. Would make a great movie.
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
Great Read About Strong Women
“The Real Mrs. Tobias” is the latest novel by Sally Koslow, author of “The Widow Waltz” and “Another Side of Paradise.” Here, we meet three generations of women, each who has had the privilege to be Mrs. Tobias. We start with the matriarch of the family, Veronika, a psychotherapist, is used to solving her patients’ problems, but the problem she cannot fix is her husband's rapid deterioration into dementia. Her daughter in law, Mel, also a psychotherapist and mother to adult twins, is facing middle-aged angst and has started to question her marriage to Jake as she reconnects with a past lover. Mel’s own daughter in law, Birdie, flees to Iowa after her husband, Micah, refuses to admit his responsibility in a hit and run that left a woman seriously injured. I love multi-generational stories that focus on the ugliness (and joy) of family. I related to all three women, even though they were quite different. So many things go wrong in this novel, but there is also so much right with how this story is told. “The Real Mrs. Tobias” is poignantly realistic, but Sally Koslow manages to balance the moments of sorrow with plenty of humor. Thanks to the author, the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to give this novel an early read.
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
Family Ties in Jeopardy
Psychotherapists abound. Where could you find a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, both with viable practices? In a novel by Sally Koslow, it appears. This novel is somewhat predictable, but it has enough “chutzpah” to grab the reader from the very beginning. Veronika, note the spelling, is the know-it-all mother-in-law who sets the rules and expects instant responses to her plans from this tight family. Mel (real name Melanie) is married to Veronika’s son, Jake, they have adult twins, Micha (son) and Jordan (daughter). It’s a larger cast of characters, and I will add one more name: Birdie, who is married to Micha. She is the most likeable character. Altogether, it is the Tobias clan. They are a close group with many of the mundane problems and pure joys close families enjoy and endure. Micha gets in trouble, which is the basis of the plot, and the story moves forward, with more characterizations and small scenes that were not necessary. The novel peaks when Birdie leaves Micha and the family must plow through some difficult health problems mixed with the joy of granddaughter, Alice. There are startling scenes; however, Koslow packs in many secondary characters. Each one serves a purpose with a different agenda, but it becomes overwhelming. Some of the humor is lost in the feisty scenes among family members. The women are stronger than the men, or course, as they steer through family crises. The novel focuses on the Jewish Tobias family. Nonetheless, Birdie’s Iowan family represents a sharp contrast and provides astute perception among resilient strong women. My gratitude to Net Galley and Harper Paperback for this pre-published book. . All opinions expressed are my own.
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
One Family. Lots of Drama.
The Real Mrs. Tobias is a pleasant read following three Mrs. Tobias - matriarch Veronika (the original Mrs. Tobias), Melanie (Veronika’s daughter-in-law), and Birdie (Veronika’s granddaughter-in-law and Melanie’s daughter-in-law). Veronika is a psychotherapist whose poise and stern nature intimidates Melanie and Birdie. Melanie is described as flighty. She is a counselor and devotes most of her energy to loving her only granddaughter, Alice, and worrying about her son, Micah who seems to be squandering his life away and is prone to making terrible decisions. Birdie is Micah’s wife and her patience for him is wearing thin. She left a prestigious writing program in Iowa to follow Micah to New York and is now wondering whether she made the right call… There is plenty to enjoy about the story. It is chock full of drama and the chapters alternate between Veronika’s, Melanie’s, and Birdie’s situations. There is a lot going on throughout the novel and while that helps create necessary tension and moves the plot forward I also think having so many plot points prevented us from really getting to know or be able to sympathize with any of the characters. Also, Micah was terrible and I feel like this wasn’t mentioned enough. It reminded me of Therese Anne Fowler’s It All Comes Down to This as they share the family drama / multi-generational aspect and focus on women in the family. Recommended to anyone looking for a diverting read about the women in one family trying to live their lives as happily as they can. Thank you Harper Perennial and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an advance copy. This is my voluntary review.
Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
highly recommended domestic drama
The Real Mrs. Tobias by Sally Koslow is a highly recommended domestic drama about mothers- and daughters-in-law. This mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship story is set in NYC in 2015. The plot follows three women in the Tobias family. The matriarch, Veronika, is a psychotherapist; Melanie (Mel) is both a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law and a counselor; and Birdie who is newly married to Mel's son, Micah,is mother to Alice. When Micah does something irresponsible and stupid, all the women chime in with their opinions on what he should do and how he should respond. Since they have already been having marital problems, after a visit from the police, Birdie takes Alice back to her parents house in Iowa. This is an entertaining look at how strong, determined women ostensibly keep families together but the mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship story is also full of stereotypes. For the most part, each chapter was narrated by one of the Tobias women, Veronika, Mel, or Birdie. The focus on a multi-generational family and all the problems inherent in their lives allows for the plot to build drama and tension. The characters are portrayed as real people with flaws and shortcomings, but with a rather light touch. Those who love family dramas will likely enjoy The Real Mrs. Tobias. The writing is excellent and Koslow does a good job providing drama and humor in the plot. Since I enjoyed it but didn't love it, I'm a bit of an outlier. Admittedly, I'm becoming rather tired of novels that are set in NYC, let alone portraying all Mid-Westerner's as stereo typically stoic. This could be a good choice for books clubs that focus on women's fiction since there are plenty of topics and plot points in the novel that beg discussion. Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of HarperCollins via NetGalley.
Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
Funny and moving and wise
I was lucky to be given a galley of Sally Koslow’s terrific new novel and am happy to give it five stars. I related to most of the characters and laughed and cried as they struggled to be their best selves in a complicated, multigenerational family. The author has many writing strengths but chief among them is her ability to show what the characters say and do vs. what they are thinking. Polite society requires us to stifle so many snarky and vulnerable thoughts, but I feel many authors fail to display authentic thoughts. There are two therapists in this book. I am a psychologist and trained psychoanalyst in private practice. So, I was eager to learn how the author would depict their practices and personal lives. Nailed it! Yes, our thoughts stray, and yes our personal lives sometimes unexpectedly overlap with our patients’ lives. The art lies in knowing limits and boundaries, and of course, in full disclosure. One character fails to disclose, and I feared it would be at her peril. Yet, in my opinion, she’s a “good enough” therapist which is apparent from other cases. The heart of this book lies, I believe, in a deep and multifaceted exploration of the limits and delimits of in-law relationships. Again, like some characters, I was a daughter-in-law and am a mother-in-law twice over and howled with laughter a dozen times as struggles to help were experienced as hinder. There is also a very intriguing mystery in this novel which created interest and tension throughout. The mystery made me ponder ethical and moral questions I had not considered before. I did not even come close to guessing it’s outcome and that was a pleasant surprise. While reading this novel I was deeply moved and laughed out loud dozens of times. If you are looking for a “can’t put it down” memorable novel this one will be sure to enrich and delight.
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com
I Love This Book
This is my book, and I’ll humble-brag if I want to because I love this story. THE REAL MRS. TOBIAS is about a loving but complicated family told from the point-of-view of three women who have married in: Veronika, the matriarch; Mel, long-married to Veronika’s son and Birdie, the wife of Mel’s son. It’s 2015 in New York City and all three women are trying to navigate personal difficulties, some of which are with one another. Veronika and Mel, despite having little in common (Mel was born in Minnesota and Veronika—born in Europe-- is the child of a Holocaust survivor) are both psychotherapists more skilled at helping other people than solving their own problems. In this novel, I’ve drawn on my own personal experience to create facets of all three characters. I’m a mother-in-law myself, with two strong daughters-in-law. I also have a mother-in-law who—at 98—has outlived my own mom by many years. In this novel, I have tried to honor all these relationships while creating a fictional portrayal that reflects how deeply complicated the dynamics can be between women who are related by marriage, not by blood. When readers describe THE REAL MRS. TOBIAS as witty, I’m flattered, because life is tough, and we all need to laugh. But I’ve also tried to bring warmth and heart to this story, which addresses complex and painful issues within the family. Most of all, I hope you enjoy this book, and if you are or have a mother-in-law/daughter-in-law, that it inspires you to reflect.
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Customer review from barnesandnoble.com